Acid Rounds: Animal Crossing: Amiibo Festival (Wii U)

Acid rounds is a semi regular, irregular spot on TGAM for games we have beasted from start to finish.

Richie: Oh another Animal Crossing game! I take it you are back to the island, lording it up as Mayor, collecting bugs, paying off your Mortgages, but this time with Amiibos?
Cunzy1 1: No. Not even. I'll level with you. This is one of the worst games I ever played. Imagine an Animal Crossing themed Mario Party board game. Without the minigames. And one board. And you have to have an Animal Crossing amiibo figure (not cards) for each player. And instead of using a controller you tap amiibos. That is this game.

Richie: Does this one address the disturbing relationship between the typically predator type animals and the more "prey" type animals i.e. How do Bianca the Tiger and Chief the Wolf maintain acceptable relationships with the plethora of herbivores which normally serve as food out there?
Cunzy1 1: No.

Richie: I mean the townsfolk and NPCs are more than likely just wearing costumes, Is animal crossing just really a series of games about furries, for furries or just another a yiff simulator?
Cunzy1 1: Not this game.

Richie: Is KK Slider knee deep in pussy? I mean he is the rockstar of this town surely all those yiff costumes are getting sodden whenever he rocks up with his guitar?
Cunzy1 1: Nobody who carries a guitar actually gets laid. 

Richie: Alright so the game is a slow rubbish boardgame, why on earth did you stick with this game?
Cunzy1 1: Why did I even buy this game in the first place? Well. It was £4.99 and came with two Amiibos which are £15 each normally. Then I felt compelled to play the game. There are mini games to unlock. All but one of them is dreadful and get this, you need even more amiibos (the Animal Crossing card ones) to play those. So I spent half a day tapping amiibos, a thing that isn't fun. It's not a novel control method. It's not toys to life. It's touching a piece of plastic to another. Hundreds of times. I unlocked all the mini games. Played each of them once. 'Platinumed' and then showered for days.

Richie: What is your stance on inter-species relationships?
Cunzy1 1: It happens a lot in nature from natural hybrids like wolphins to symbiosis and parasite and parasitoid relationships. We're only just beginning to understand how some of these interactions work and how some of these lead to shaping life in our Universe (e.g. the 'great engulfing').

Richie: If you had to, I mean really had to, like if  your family was kidnapped and the only way to save them from a brutal and horrible death, which one of the villagers would you do?

Cunzy1 1: Marina & Zucker at the same time. 

Richie: You sick fuck

Richie: Would you recommend this game to... Anyone?
Cunzy1 1: No. Absolutely not. Even if you're a huge Animal Crossing fan. Even if you see it discounted or even get paid to own it, get it, rip the amiibos out and trash the game. Don't be tempted. The absolute most frustrating thing about this game is the wasted amiibo potential on top of an awful game. Amiibo is in the frickin' title. It's a really, really shallow game. At the very least there should have been some amiibo compatability outside of specific Animal Crossing ones for the board games and the cards for the mini games. People love crossovers and they love their favourite characters. Perhaps the board game would have been slightly less agonising if you could play with Little Mac, Mewtwo and Giant Detective Pikachu, all of which have limited use outside of one title. Terrible. Almost ashamed to have it on my Backloggery. Almost.