Pushing the PC gaming boundaries

The BBC has this nice little article about how PCs are better at games than consoles or some such. I don't really know as I haven't fully read it as my attention span only lasts for a paragraph before I'm bored. But I got the gist.

All I do know is that whatever you may think about PCs, the people that play them are GEEKS. Nerdo-rama. They wear big rimmed glasses and have braces. They don't have sex either. They just beat off over video game characters who sex with other dead video game characters (see above Fahrenheit).

Some guy from Nvidia says:

"It's absolute nonsense to think that consoles are at the cutting edge,"

Yeah but only fucking nerds buy your shitty graphics cards and that clearly isn't enough. That's why you put those little leaflets in every single one of Future Publishing's console oriented magazines going on and on about how Nvidia is the future and good. BTW Nvidia, those leaflets are shit. Purely because PC games are mostly boring stuff about menu managment or Orcs. Don't believe me? If you were Nvidia and you made good graphics cards for PC games who would you have as your mascot? Some kind of three penised dragon with chainsaw guns on it's seven legs cutting up thousands of Triceratops-bats and there is blood everywhere and no matter how long you look you can always find something new to look at. The pained expression on a Triceratops-bat's face as it's guts spill out. The little dribbles of blood from the dragon tri-penis. NOT A FUCKING MERMAID I BET. If PCs are so great Nvidia, why do you pander to the geeky nerdbase users by rendering tits all the time?. Fucking idiots. If you are on a PC anyway, you are only ever two clicks away from photos of real or enhanced titty-bons.

Oh and another thing about PC gaming, imagine this: you buy a woman of the night and take her home you get yourself ready, lube to hand, and all of a sudden a guy pops out of your closet and says sorry you can't do that bird you just bought because your hardware isn't up to it. You can only do her after you've spent £200 on penis enhancements but even then you can only do her when she is looking ugly or if she is on the blob and spotty and even then only a for a bit because your hardware cannot cope with her at her hottest and she is getting increasingly hot. That wasn't actually a story that was an analogy. In the analogy the woman of the night is a computer game and the man's penis is his PC. For geeks that are reading this and are unfamiliar with my terms a woman looks like this:

You like it huh? Well imagine if you couldn't do her or her cantaloupe melon tits. That's what playing games on a PC is. Despite what Nvidia nerds may tell you through the BBC. Which is full of geeks anyway. Just buy a DS and the witch touching game if you are that desperate for tits. At least on the DS you can kind of touch them.

Fucking nerds and mermaids. Geeks.