That guy's a Maniac...

For the last 10 years, the consumer electronics industry has been converging towards mobile. At one point you would have all your digital devices, your digital camera, your camcorder, your MP3 Player, your Sat Nav, your PDA and your Mobile Phone all connected up to you PC which acted as a Digital hub for all that content and media.  Not that long ago right?  In fact I still have all of these devices, i just use them way less now or not at all.  These of course have been largely replaced by the one device to rule them all, the smartphone. I have used 4 smartphone platforms, Windows Mobile, Android, Blackberry and most recently iOS. I've gotta say carrying around one device rather than seven is obviously convenient, but only recently have these devices matured to a level where it's also realistic. When Apple CEO Steve Jobs was recently asked what the future of the PC was, he used an interesting automotive analogy.  " When we were an agrarian nat...

Crazy summoned Demon hands to rip apart any wrongdoers, man that would be an awesome skill to have the next time someone tries to sell me the Big Issue. Seriously though, Dragon Age 2 Đ

I have a bit of a love/hate relationship with Achievements (Trophies if you swing that way). In some respects I hate the fact they try and control the fun to the extent where I feel like I can't cut loose and just enjoy game anymore. I do however like to have something tangible now from a game upon completion, something that I can look back on and at a glance tell how much I got from the game , how long I spent and even to an extent how much i enjoyed the game. So when we did the  Painful Moments in Gaming  week it got me thinking about games from my past and how it would be nice to have a record of time spent on games from my childhood. So here is my top 10 list of games that I spent a lot of time on as a kid, each of which I'd love a record of achievement for and what I think I would have scored.. (I am aware that some of these games are available on XBLA)  #1 . Treasure Island Dizzy(C64): 970,  I was  robbed  of a perfe...

Like Mario? Got an Android 2.1 Smartphone? All that extra battery life getting you down? You need this! Đ

As some may be aware, if you buy a new copy of Dragonage you get a redemption code for 'The Stone Prisoner' DLC included in the box. For those not buying a new copy the DLC will cost you 1200MS Points, which quite frankly is quite a lot for a little plot and an extra character. But hey it's a nice way of keeping people buying new games and supporting the medium right? Well imagine my dismay when I see on the back of the box in the small print that the code expires on April 30th! Seeming like an obvious EA scheme to maintain the high price of an ageing game I was naturally pissed off. However dear reader, the silver lining (and the point) of this tale is that I fired in the code anyway (on June 2nd) and it worked anyway!! So if you are on the fence about buying this great  game and feeling cheated about the DLC, then get involved, the code (as of June 2nd) has yet to expire! Đ

Gears of War 2: So yeah as you may of noticed I'm a fan of Gears of War and try and play online with select friends as much as I can. With that said I am yet to claim that I am any good at the game. It's the kind of game that if you take any extensive break from it, your skills become far less sharp very quickly. I find at the moment I've not been regular enough to claim to be good, although occasionally show flashes of the old magic. So on to the glory. This particular match was in Execution mode on the 'River' map. The game was tied at 4 rounds each and the final round had started. I went off to the hut/tower to get the Torque Bow while the rest of my team picked up grenades and congregated at the Boom shot. As it turns out we didn't get the Boomshot and with one "Boom" my entire team was taken out. I was alone. Alone in the hut with five Locusts hunting me down. Almost instantly one of them came eagerly ch...

Treasure Island Dizzy: The pain isn't over yet... The year was 1989, I had a Commodore 64. Games like Outlaw, Double Dragon and Bubble Bobble frequented my tv screen. My favourite however was Treasure Isand Dizzy from Code Masters and the Oliver Twins. The plot was basically, you're stuck on an island and want to get back to the 'yolkfolk' . Through a series of inventory based puzzles you build a boat and get off the island by paying the shopkeeper character 30 Gold coins (which you have collected throughout). For those of you who are unaware, this was seen as the most difficult of the Dizzy Franchise, unlike the predecessor which you had 5 lives and the sequel which had 3, in Treasure Island Dizzy you had one life. Consider that for a moment, one life. One life, with no ability to save the game, it was all or nothing. This also wasn't an easy game, you had to essentially memorise the side-scrolling map, often jumping blindly in to the next...

The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion   Oblivion was one of my first experiences on a 'next gen' platform and looking back I was a far more innocent gamer. I wasn't bothered by achievements, or consulting any guides to make sure I didn't miss out on any weapons or plot developments. I was just happy exploring the world and seeing what happened. I remember the first time i was afflicted by Vampirism and having to abandon the main plot while I dealt with this truly surprising plot twist, I miss that innocence and it was only a couple of years ago. Anyway I digress. Oblivion for me was a return to the days of Diablo, which lent itself to multiple playthroughs where you could share equipment across save files and over time I had amassed a huge collection of equipment. This hoarding nature was quickly appearing in Oblivion too. As I ventured innocently across the world of Cyrodill I started to acquire a lot of cool shit, Unique Weapons, Daedric artifacts,...

SSX: Tricky The Year was 2002 and Richie! and Cunzy11 had been playing SSX:Tricky with various Portsmouthians on the PS2 all year. Summer came along and Richie! introduced it in to my life and thus started many many hours and many many sessions of Tricky. Now although we all completed the game to get the best boards/characters etc, the main focus was one of the first tracks, Garibaldi. The tracks simplicity lent itself to a points frenzy, so the game was simple; how many points can you grab in one run by hitting as many x2, x3, and x5 multipliers as possible. Over the months, we poured endless hours in to devising the best route that gave the best pay off in points. Often we would incorporate part of eachothers run in to ours, constantly refining the process. We even theorised about what score a 'perfect run' would yield. The right of passage target (before you were considered a contender) was 1 Million points, however quickly 2M was achieved and everyo...

Apparently some classy woman decided to tell the world about her tale of over active lady bits following a Wii fit session that just got too much for her one day. Amanda Flowers, 24 from Harpurhey fell off her Wii Fit board (presumably on her cunt) and has since developed persistent sexual arousal syndrome from a damaged nerve, or sticky twat for short. As a result of this Amanda Flowers, 24 from Harpuhney is aroused by the slightest of vibrations, from Mobile Phones & Food Processors to Omastar's Seismic Toss. Amanda Flowers, 24 from Hapurhey had these moving words to say: "It started as a twinge down below before surging through my body. Sometimes it built up into a trembling orgasm" "With no cure, I just have to try and control my passion by breathing deeply. Hopefully one day I'll find a superstud that can satisfy me" Well Amanda, 24 from Hapurhey, If you're ever at TGAM towers and not so large that a Wii Fit board can...

 Here's what we know so far: New Weapons: Sawed off Double-Barrel Shotgun(awesome damage, slow reload), Pendulum Lancer (kick's like a bitch with a nasty blade for executions) 4 Player Online Campaign Co-op: Player 1 is Marcus, 2 is Dom, 3 Baird, 4 Cole Pulp Fictionesque intertwining plot: Players will command other squad's that merge the plot with Delta. Improved Regional filters for less laggy games: Hallefuckinglujah! Refined Cover system Possible squad command system (Rainbow 6 stylee???) Female characters/Tits: As our anonymous commenter points out, i neglected to mention that Anya makes an appearance in the trailer and will be a playable (presumably online) character. Whether there will be more tits announced later remains to be seen. Released April 2011: FML Đ

Cliff 'don't call me Cliffy B' Blezinski was due on 'Late night with Jimmy Fallon' (yeah we haven't heard of him either) last night to give some details on the latest unannounced offering from Epic Games, however had to cancel at the last minute, instead being replaced by the Canadian Pop singer Justin Bieber (seriously this Jimmy Fallon show is getting more appealing by the second) According to Cliffy B's Twitter account : " The truth of the matter is that we wanted to take a couple more days to polish what we're showing, Sorry all, appreciate your patience! " Will El Cliffster announce Gears of War 3, will it address our previous issues , will they announce some other Epic shooter or as his tweet suggests will he merely expose himself to Jimmy Fallon's audience? (literally dozens!) All these questions and more will be answered on Monday the 12th April when Cliffarooney is scheduled to appear. In case you were worried the rumou...

Ok, I'm a bit of an Oblivion nut. It was the first real game on the 360 that i got lost in (and still do to this day) Richie then moved me on to Fallout 3 "It's oblivion with guns!!" and Ive gotta say I'm enjoying that universe and the seemingly endless, yet rich DLC (no horse armour here!) However I've always been a sucker for a more traditional fantasy setting, so when we heard from GDC about a new Dungeon Crawler from Bethesda with a 2 player Co-op focus i think i soiled myself slightly. So what is it? Well it's called Hunted: The Demon's Forge (Anyone else picturing the Chaos Sanctuary in Diablo 2?) and it's a third person, 2 player Co-op game based around 2 hero's, E'lara (think Amazon Bow and Arrowey type person) and Caddoc (Barbarian Tank type person with insanely big swords and grunts)  The co-op is restricted to online co-op (Richie you in?) as they wanted to 'maintain a level of detail'  There is also a Matc...

Windows Phone 7 series Xbox Live integration Is this the future of handheld gaming? I hope not. I might be being shortsighted here but I really think there needs to be separate real estate for controls for any meaningful gaming. ( Tap Tap Revenge isn't meaningful) With Web browsing and scrolling through contacts, touch makes sense, you touch it once then view, with a game (short of a Guitarhero style rhythm game) you need to be able to view the screen and react quickly without smudging it up with your fat fingers. Bring back snake I say! However given the Xbox Live integration with achievements, there will no doubt be endless subpar titles purchased and played solely for boosting their penis compensating GamerScore. However, with that said if they make Diablo 2 on this sucker, with cheevos, I'm in!! Đ

After the recent debate over the Wii , it is nice to see there is some real innovation and blue sky thinking out there. Finally, a new type of controller I can get behind! Đ [ Flopculture ]

Since I was a kid, gaming has always been synonymous with Nintendo. Here was a company that for me had awesome graphics, huge libraries of games and timeless franchises. However this relationship unfortunately ended with the Game Cube and while the Wii has been a runaway succes it got me thinking why did they lose me as a customer? My first gaming system was a Commodore 64, a system that looked enough like it might be educational to fool my parents, however for me it was purely for games. While I spent many hours with Treasure Island Dizzy (one life and no saving!!), bubble bobble and Rick Dangerous, my first experience with what i believed to be 'true' gaming was the Nintendo Entertainment System (NES) I would accompany my parents on trips to Makro and immediately split from them and head to the gaming isle where they had a Nintendo wall with NES systems running Super Mario Bros and Duck Hunt. These Instant gaming machines let you slip in to a simple, co...