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Showing posts with the label Switch

Starlink: Tourist Around Atlas

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We treated ourself to Starlink: Battle for Atlas , Ubisoft's buildable ship toys-to-life game over Christmas seeing as the starter pack and accessories were criminally discounted and we love a good space flight ship game (we're somewhat in a renaissance after years of nothing!) & didn't have enough single title use plastic crap. I'm loving the game, so much that I'm savouring it rather than smashing through to hit the credits but in lieu of a longer post on it here's some postcards from Atlas taken using the excellent photo mode, added as a bonus free update over Christmas! Photo mode comes with a range of tools and filters and we've spent shockingly long snapping away. SHIPS We're playing it on Switch, so obviously Arwing is best but we're a little bit in love with Pulse, the saucy little red number piloted by ex-racing driver Chase. It's true that red ones go faster. This one we call 'BLUE'. It hangs above our sex bed in ou...

Nintendo Switch Online NES Games: Shag, Marry or Push off a Cliff

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Last year, Nintendo made the slightly uncontroversial and in line with what competitors have been doing for decades business decision to start charging for the service to play games online with the Nintendo Switch. In order to sweeten the deal somewhat a paid membership gets you access to online play, exclusive offers (such as cosmetics in some games and those stupid but cool but stupid but expensive but worth it NES Switch controllers), sometimes cloud saves and most controversially gives you access to a growing library of NES games playable as long as you're subbed up. Some vocal gamers, however, did not like this decision at all because they either already own and play the NES games on offer (lies nobody ever intentionally bought Super Dodge Ball let alone played it on the go) or they didn't want the NES games but wouldn't mind free N64 games or SNES games perhaps? Like winged monkeys with neckbeards they took to social media en mass to whine about it. This level of...

Katamari: Re-roll. Gammon Review

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Dear Snowflakes, What is your fucking problem, pie and mash not good enough for you, why don’t you go and have a word with yourself before I anti-vax your Pain au Chocolat! Yeah that’s right jog on before you do yourself a culturally appropriated mischief, innit. You think the fucking King of all Cosmos is watching the latest fucking lecture from Dr Who on woke culture? Nah m8, he’s putting his boys out on the front line, gettin ‘em learning the family trade and any of you muggy cunts out there sipping on gender fluid organic cruelty free soy lattes, who are not doing the same should be ordered to ring the parents of a soldier who has died serving their country in Afghanistan and tell them their reasons. Brexit means Brexit! Imperial measurements, blue passports, mothers pride bread and tesco value beans, top of the pops and rehashes of games from 2004. Fuck the 350 million to the NHS, I’ll give £16.99 of my hard earned for that privilege! Just the price of a pint of milk in...